Read Online The Promise: A Tragic Accident, a Paralyzed Bride, and the Power of Love, Loyalty, and Friendship by Rachelle Friedman - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Rachelle Friedman
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along I knew Chris and I were supposed to be together, not meant to be. That was the only place I got confused about predestiny a bit, when I pondered why all of this happened, knowing there was no good answer. Chris and I were supposed to be because we were the right fit for each other, the perfect match, but I’m not sure if we were predestined, though the differentiation confused me when I thought about it. I didn’t believe I was meant to be injured, or predestined to spend my life unable to walk. That’s why it confused me a bit when it came to our love; it was the only thing that I couldn’t square because otherwise our relationship was so perfect, it felt like we were soul mates. I felt like I’d die without him; I couldn’t breathe were he not there. I realized it was hypocritical to say you believe in soul mates but you don’t believe in fate. It’s kind of convenient: Some good things are meant to be and bad things are not, and maybe fate steps in sometimes. There is a passage in the Zohar, a set of books on Jewish mysticism, that says that one soul comes down to earth but it’s split into two. One part goes to a baby boy and the other part to a baby girl, and if they be worthy, God reunites them in marriage. So you have to be a good person to get that other part of your soul. You won’t necessarily be together for sure, but your choices make you worthy of finding your soul mate or not. Maybe that’s the case. Maybe it’s not.
It was a dilemma I struggled with often beyond the question about love. Many people e-mailed me and commented on news stories about my accident, saying that it was “God’s will” and “Everything happened for a reason.” There are so many awful things that occur in our world, and I found it difficult to believe that any higher power would purposely cause people pain. I just refused to believe that. A horrific event like Sandy Hook couldn’t have been God’s will. Kidnapping of children can’t be God’s will. Terrible diseases can’t be God’s will. My never walking can’t be God’s will. I like to believe if there is a higher power, he or she wouldn’t do such terrible things to people.
I was raised Jewish, and I went to Hebrew school twice a week and Sunday school once a week, but in my household I was simply raised with morals and taught to be a nice person. At times religious people said, “Be good, so you can go to heaven” or “Because that’s what God wants,” but I didn’t want to be good to go to heaven; I wanted to be good because it was the right thing to do. So religion wasn’t a big thing for me, though I knew it had helped a lot of people and I didn’t begrudge anyone who clung to it. I didn’t pray or talk to any higher power or base my decision on any religion or higher power. I just went about my life as a moral person.
Honestly, more than a church, Chris and I had a place on the beach that was our place to reflect, and it was meaningful for us. It was the 65th Street spot. That night we started our relationship, we didn’t kiss, but the next day we went on a date to a restaurant called the Duck Inn. The restaurant was a Virginia Beach staple. I had had my prom there and lifeguard banquets there. It was just one of those places with a lot of history. We ate seafood, and when the bill came he paid, a courtesy I wasn’t used to at all. After dinner we went to our spot on the beach, the one where we had just stayed up all night talking. We put down a blanket, and I remember him leaning into me, and we kissed with the sound of waves crashing, the smell of the ocean making me so happy.
In rehab I looked back on those days, and I was so proud that I knew how good I had it. I believed, even then, that we, as humans, have the power to make something positive of a bad situation. While I don’t believe that “everything happens for a reason,” I believe we can give anything a purpose, even a negative situation. Good things came from my injury
It was a dilemma I struggled with often beyond the question about love. Many people e-mailed me and commented on news stories about my accident, saying that it was “God’s will” and “Everything happened for a reason.” There are so many awful things that occur in our world, and I found it difficult to believe that any higher power would purposely cause people pain. I just refused to believe that. A horrific event like Sandy Hook couldn’t have been God’s will. Kidnapping of children can’t be God’s will. Terrible diseases can’t be God’s will. My never walking can’t be God’s will. I like to believe if there is a higher power, he or she wouldn’t do such terrible things to people.
I was raised Jewish, and I went to Hebrew school twice a week and Sunday school once a week, but in my household I was simply raised with morals and taught to be a nice person. At times religious people said, “Be good, so you can go to heaven” or “Because that’s what God wants,” but I didn’t want to be good to go to heaven; I wanted to be good because it was the right thing to do. So religion wasn’t a big thing for me, though I knew it had helped a lot of people and I didn’t begrudge anyone who clung to it. I didn’t pray or talk to any higher power or base my decision on any religion or higher power. I just went about my life as a moral person.
Honestly, more than a church, Chris and I had a place on the beach that was our place to reflect, and it was meaningful for us. It was the 65th Street spot. That night we started our relationship, we didn’t kiss, but the next day we went on a date to a restaurant called the Duck Inn. The restaurant was a Virginia Beach staple. I had had my prom there and lifeguard banquets there. It was just one of those places with a lot of history. We ate seafood, and when the bill came he paid, a courtesy I wasn’t used to at all. After dinner we went to our spot on the beach, the one where we had just stayed up all night talking. We put down a blanket, and I remember him leaning into me, and we kissed with the sound of waves crashing, the smell of the ocean making me so happy.
In rehab I looked back on those days, and I was so proud that I knew how good I had it. I believed, even then, that we, as humans, have the power to make something positive of a bad situation. While I don’t believe that “everything happens for a reason,” I believe we can give anything a purpose, even a negative situation. Good things came from my injury
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