Read Online The Grunts In Trouble by Philip Ardagh - Free Book Online

from inside it. Mrs Grunt and Sunny sat either side of him.
    “Map?” asked Sunny excitedly.
    “You heard your father,” said Mrs Grunt. “M-O-P, map.”
    “That’s a mop,” snorted Mr Grunt.
    “No it isn’t,” said Mrs Grunt. “I know a map when I see one. And anyhows, a mop wouldn’t fit in an envelope that size!”

    “M-O-P spells mop!” said Mr Grunt.
    “Of course it does,” said Mrs Grunt. “But that’s got nothing to do with—”
    Mr Grunt banged his fist on the table. “You just said ‘M-O-P, map’,” he said.
    “Didn’t,” said Mrs Grunt (who secretly suspected she might have).
    “Did,” said Mr Grunt.
    “Didn’t!”
    “Did!”
    “Didn’t!”
    “Did!”
    “Didn’t!”
    “Did!”
    “Didn’t!”
    “Did! Did! Did!” said Mr Grunt.
    While they were busy arguing, Sunny studied the hand-drawn map lying on the table. The most interesting part was where the big X was, next to what looked like a small wooden building. The other side of the X were two words: ELEPHANT HERE.
    “Dad?” he asked.
    “What?” asked Mr Grunt.
    “Did we just buy an elephant?”
    “No.”
    “No?”
    “No, Sunny. You just bought an elephant,” said Mr Grunt. “Nothing to do with me or your mother.”
    “If you say so,” said Sunny.
    “He did say so!” snorted Mrs Grunt. “I saw his lips move and everything.”
    “But it wasn’t my money,” said Sunny.
    “Money?” said Mr Grunt (with a grunt). “Who said anything about money?”
    “Sunny just did,” said Mrs Grunt helpfully.
    Mr Grunt glared at her.
    “Well, if it wasn’t money in the envelope, what was it then?” asked Sunny. “What else can you pay for a circus elephant with?”
    “Ooooh,” said Mrs Grunt. “So it’s not just any old kind of elephant – it’s a CIRCUS elephant. I had no idea.”
    “Of course you had no idea, wife,” said MrGrunt. “Because this buying-of-an-elephant business was nothing to do with us, was it?”
    “I thought you said—”
    “WAS IT?” Mr Grunt glowered.
    “Um … No. You’re right, mister,” said Mrs Grunt with genuine pride at her husband’s scheming.
    “I’m only guessing it’s from a circus,” said Sunny, “because you … we … I bought it off Mr Lippy, who is a clown .”
    “We have taught you well, Sunny!” said Mr Grunt.
    “What was in the envelope, if it wasn’t money, Dad?”
    “Another map, drawn by me this time,” said Mr Grunt triumphantly.
    “A map leading to something Mr Lippy wants?” asked Sunny. “So it’s a sort of swap?”
    “S’what he just said!” said Mrs Grunt.
    “Kind of,” said Mr Grunt.
    “Why only ‘kind of’, Dad?” asked Sunny. He had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.
    “Because although my map is real, what it leads to isn’t exactly what I’d promised it would be,” said Mr Grunt.
    Now Sunny was feeling really uneasy. “What did you promise to give him in exchange for the elephant?” he asked.
    “It doesn’t matter, because what he’s actually getting is close enough. Just not precisely what we agreed!” Mr Grunt laughed.
    “Exactly!” said Mrs Grunt, who spent much of the time not really knowing what was going on but doing her best to pretend she did.
    “But that’s cheating!” said Sunny. “That’s wrong.”
    “I’ll tell you what’s wrong, Sunny,” said MrGrunt. “Stealing an elephant from a circus is what’s wrong. Do you really think the elephant was Mr Lippy’s to swap in the first place?”
    “Not necessarily—”
    “So you could argue that we’re –” Mr Grunt tried to think of the right words. “We’re teaching him a lesson.”
    “A lesson that you should never trust people!” said Mrs Grunt proudly.
    “Quiet, wife,” said Mr Grunt. “You’re making a fool of yourself.”
    “No more than you are!” Mrs Grunt retorted.
    “Numbskull!” said Mr Grunt.
    “Toolbag!” said Mrs Grunt.
    “Armpit!” said Mr Grunt.
    “Trench coat!” said Mrs Grunt.
    “Don’t you think Mr