was comfortingâknowing this was realâand she basked in it, feeling the nightâs memories in her unfolding like a crumpled paper, the sequence choppy but structured as Jack insisted that they go over it once more, defining a clean memory from both his and her thoughts.
It was only when she eased into the satiated state of a successful memory defragment that fear bubbled up again, rising through the carefully stacked memories, welling up around the jagged edges and swamping her. An unreasonable fear that she was wrong, that sheâd made a mistake she couldnât come back from, took her.
It was from the first weave, the one she no longer had memories of. She had been lied to! She was in danger, foul, loathsome, untrustworthy. . . .
Periâs breath caught as Jackâs presence strengthened. Not you , Jack said, his unspoken words ringing in her mind as he sponged up her fear, dissolving it with his confidence. Not you, Peri. Youâre clean. You are uncorrupt, my dove .
Her chest clenched as his love soaked into her, hiding the fear behind it, and the trembling of her arms eased. Jack burned the fear to ash, telling her he loved her, trusted her, that anything else was a lie. Slowly . . . she believed. She had to.
âIâm here,â Jack said aloud, and she felt his fingers find hers, both of them touching the button sheâd taken from the dead guard. His calm seeped into her as she worked the rough, round edges of the small chunk of blue plastic. Jack had been there, had seen both times, and had burned away the mistake theyâd made until there was only one memory, the last.
Periâs bruises ached anew as she remembered last night and they were given meaning. Her almost-death had never happened, and she only knew of it because Jack had told her about it last night. Secondhand knowledge was safeâa real memory deadly. New Yearâs and their anniversary were still gone, but there were ways around that, too: her diary waited at home.
Her eyes opened. Jack was kneeling before her, and he smiled as their eyes met. Her thumb was catching on the buttonâs holes, and she stopped rubbing it like the touchstone it was. âThank you,â she said.
Jack leaned forward and brushed the hair from her eyes. âYouâre welcome.â
His voice was husky, and sweat had beaded on his forehead. It had been a hard one. Peri set the button on the scratched table, accidentally dragging it off, and it hit the carpet and rolled under the bed.
Jackâs arms went around her, and she leaned into him, breathing the scent of his hair, her arms tightening when she realized he was shaking. Her eyes warmed with unshed tears. âI almost lost you,â he said raggedly. âI did lose you. I donât know if I can do this anymore, babe.â
She parted her knees and pulled him closer, close enough to feel the warmth of him rising between them. He grounded her, kept her sane when the drafts grew too long and the weaves too elaborate. Most people would say he had the easy part, out of the line of fire as she protected him while he got whatever they were after, but the truth of it was that his job was harder. He saw everything, lived everything, relived it again and again until she remembered it, too.
He was still shaking, and Peri tilted his head up. âItâs so hard,â he said. âPeri, I love you.â
âI love you, too.â She kissed him, tasting walnuts. âIâm okay,â she said, holding him close and breathing him in. âLet it go.â
âBut what if I hadnât been there?â A tight anger eclipsed his grief, his fierce expression hurting her, almost. âWhat if you hadnât come back and I had nothing to anchor you? You would have lost everything.â He reached up and touched her jawline. âAnd Iâd lose you.â
Peri took his hands, feeling his strength. There was no answer, no sure
Bruce Alexander
Barbara Monajem
Chris Grabenstein
Brooksley Borne
Erika Wilde
S. K. Ervin
Adele Clee
Stuart M. Kaminsky
Gerald A Browne
Writing