Read Online Sociopaths In Love by Andersen Prunty - Free Book Online
Authors: Andersen Prunty
Tags: Satire, Romantic Comedy, Serial Killers, weird, Black humor, Ohio, transgressive, gone girl, dayton, chuck palahniuk, american psycho, bret easton ellis, grindhouse press, andersen prunty, sociopaths, tampa
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it if it had been
just anyone but I guess when I saw the way you looked at her in the
restaurant, it kind of made me mad at her. But then I think I felt
really bad. It seemed so cruel. I don't know if I would have
thought it seemed so cruel if it was just me and you. But all those
people standing around and laughing while she died. I guess I'm
just not used to it. Or it's just not my idea of a good time. But,
more than anything, I guess I found it entertaining. I mean, when I
was actually standing there watching it . . . I don't
know if I've ever felt anything quite like that."
He slid his shoes on. She couldn't tell if
he was paying attention to her or not. "All the feelings will go
away. It doesn't happen overnight. What you're feeling is years and
years of being taught to feel a certain way. But it's all based on
perception. You don't want to be perceived as a cruel person.
You're thinking, if you get caught, you'll go to jail and you don't
want to be seen as a criminal. But no one sees you anyway so you
have to get rid of those perceptions. Even God doesn't see you." He
laughed. "Just kidding. There is no God. Meaning there is no moral
judgment. No eternity of damnation and hellfire. Meaning the only
people that particular experience mattered to were those directly
involved. And the only person who didn't like it, probably, was the
waitress. See, it's very democratic."
"What about her family?"
"What about the families of cancer patients,
car accident victims, anything? Start worrying about people like
that and you'll go crazy."
"I really have to pee."
"No toilet. You should go on the mattress.
The Boys'll never know. And I wouldn't mind watching."
She dropped her shorts and squatted on the
mattress, Walt watching her the entire time. She couldn't really
imagine anyone getting off on that but she guessed her imagination
would soon change as much as her reality. She wiped herself with
one of the disgusting blankets, pulled her shorts back up, and
followed Walt outside.
He hadn't told her exactly what time it was
but it was one of those days where the sun never came out so it
didn't really matter. It would be gray and feel like dawn all day
before gradually bleeding into a foggy night. They got in the car
and she noticed the keys dangling from the ignition. She could have
left. Now she couldn't even say it hadn't occurred to her. She
remembered thinking about it and not doing it. A voice in her head
told her that had been her chance. If she convinced herself she
wasn't responsible for anything that had happened before that, she
would have to accept responsibility for everything that happened
after.
Walt started the car and headed down the
long lane, everything monochrome and damp and flattened.
"What would you have done if I'd left last
night?"
"What do you mean?"
"When you and the Boys left to, um, retrieve
the waitress . . . What would you have done if I'd taken
the car and gone back home?"
"I knew you wouldn't."
"But what if I had?"
"Then I guess I would have had to admit that
I was wrong."
"Wrong?"
"Yeah. I told you
. . . Me wanting you to be here is only part of it. You want to be
here as much as I want you to be here. I guess if you had taken the
car back to your house I would have found a different car and
changed my plans. And would have wished the best for you because
going back is not always an option."
"What's that mean?"
"Nothing I can explain. And nothing I've
tried. It's just . . . well, the people who I've heard of
trying to go back tend to disappear."
"Disappear?"
"Yep."
"Disappear like you never
hear from them again or disappear like poof ?"
"Poof!" Walt's eyes widened. "The earth has
a way of swallowing people up."
That made her think of a cave again. She
remembered the old man from last night.
"What happened to that old man?"
"Old man?"
"Yeah. He was in one of the smaller beds
last night but he was gone this morning. What happened to him?"
"I don't remember seeing him. The
just anyone but I guess when I saw the way you looked at her in the
restaurant, it kind of made me mad at her. But then I think I felt
really bad. It seemed so cruel. I don't know if I would have
thought it seemed so cruel if it was just me and you. But all those
people standing around and laughing while she died. I guess I'm
just not used to it. Or it's just not my idea of a good time. But,
more than anything, I guess I found it entertaining. I mean, when I
was actually standing there watching it . . . I don't
know if I've ever felt anything quite like that."
He slid his shoes on. She couldn't tell if
he was paying attention to her or not. "All the feelings will go
away. It doesn't happen overnight. What you're feeling is years and
years of being taught to feel a certain way. But it's all based on
perception. You don't want to be perceived as a cruel person.
You're thinking, if you get caught, you'll go to jail and you don't
want to be seen as a criminal. But no one sees you anyway so you
have to get rid of those perceptions. Even God doesn't see you." He
laughed. "Just kidding. There is no God. Meaning there is no moral
judgment. No eternity of damnation and hellfire. Meaning the only
people that particular experience mattered to were those directly
involved. And the only person who didn't like it, probably, was the
waitress. See, it's very democratic."
"What about her family?"
"What about the families of cancer patients,
car accident victims, anything? Start worrying about people like
that and you'll go crazy."
"I really have to pee."
"No toilet. You should go on the mattress.
The Boys'll never know. And I wouldn't mind watching."
She dropped her shorts and squatted on the
mattress, Walt watching her the entire time. She couldn't really
imagine anyone getting off on that but she guessed her imagination
would soon change as much as her reality. She wiped herself with
one of the disgusting blankets, pulled her shorts back up, and
followed Walt outside.
He hadn't told her exactly what time it was
but it was one of those days where the sun never came out so it
didn't really matter. It would be gray and feel like dawn all day
before gradually bleeding into a foggy night. They got in the car
and she noticed the keys dangling from the ignition. She could have
left. Now she couldn't even say it hadn't occurred to her. She
remembered thinking about it and not doing it. A voice in her head
told her that had been her chance. If she convinced herself she
wasn't responsible for anything that had happened before that, she
would have to accept responsibility for everything that happened
after.
Walt started the car and headed down the
long lane, everything monochrome and damp and flattened.
"What would you have done if I'd left last
night?"
"What do you mean?"
"When you and the Boys left to, um, retrieve
the waitress . . . What would you have done if I'd taken
the car and gone back home?"
"I knew you wouldn't."
"But what if I had?"
"Then I guess I would have had to admit that
I was wrong."
"Wrong?"
"Yeah. I told you
. . . Me wanting you to be here is only part of it. You want to be
here as much as I want you to be here. I guess if you had taken the
car back to your house I would have found a different car and
changed my plans. And would have wished the best for you because
going back is not always an option."
"What's that mean?"
"Nothing I can explain. And nothing I've
tried. It's just . . . well, the people who I've heard of
trying to go back tend to disappear."
"Disappear?"
"Yep."
"Disappear like you never
hear from them again or disappear like poof ?"
"Poof!" Walt's eyes widened. "The earth has
a way of swallowing people up."
That made her think of a cave again. She
remembered the old man from last night.
"What happened to that old man?"
"Old man?"
"Yeah. He was in one of the smaller beds
last night but he was gone this morning. What happened to him?"
"I don't remember seeing him. The
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