control them. “It was so awful … and so wrong. … He was never there, and when he was, it was.” She couldn’t go on, she just cried as she shook her head, bereft of words to describe the feelings, as her mother stroked her long silky hair and held her.
“I know, darling … I know … I can only imagine what it was like. I know it must have been awful. But it’s over And you’re not Your life is just beginning. Don’t give up before you’ve given it a chance. Look around, feel the breeze, smell the flowers, let yourself live again Please …”
Sarah clung to her as she listened to her mother’s words, and finally told her how she felt, as she continued to cry. “I can’t anymore… I’m too afraid….”
“I’m right here with you.” But they hadn’t been able to help her before—until the end, when they’d gotten her out of it But they couldn’t have made Freddie behave, or come home at night, or give up his girlfriends and his prostitutes, and they hadn’t been able to save the baby. She had learned the hard way that there were times when no one else could help you, not even your parents.
“You have to try again, sweetheart. Just in tiny little steps. Father and I will be right here with you” She pulled away from her then, and looked into her daughter’s eyes. “We love you very, very much, Sarah, and we don’t want you hurt again either.”
Sarah closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “I’ll try.” She opened her eyes again then and looked at her mother. “I really will.” And then she panicked. “But what if I can’t do it?”
“Can’t do what?” Her mother smiled at her. “Can’t take a walk with me and Father? Can’t have dinner with us? Can’t meet a few of our friends? I think you can. We won’t ask for too much, and if it really is more than you can do, then you’ll tell us.” It was as though she had become an invalid, and in some ways, she had. Freddie had crippled her, and she knew it The question now was if she could be healed, or helped; if she would recover. Her mother couldn’t bear the thought that maybe she couldn’t. “How about a walk?”
“I look awful. My eyes must be swollen. And my nose always gets red when I cry.” She laughed through her tears as her mother made a face at her.
“That’s the worst piece of nonsense I’ve ever heard. Your nose is not red.” Sarah hopped out of her chair to look in the mirror and gave a shout of disgust.
“It is too! Look at it, it looks like a red potato!”
“Let me see….” Victoria narrowed her eyes and peered at Sarah’s nose as she shook her head. “It must be a very, very small potato. I don’t think anyone will notice anything, if you throw a little cold water on your face, and comb your hair, and maybe even put on a spot of lipstick.” She hadn’t worn makeup in months, and she didn’t seem to care, and up until now, Victoria hadn’t pressed it.
“I didn’t bring any with me.” Sarah looked deliberately vague. She really didn’t know if she wanted to try, but she was touched by what her mother had said, and she didn’t want to be completely uncooperative, even if that meant wearing lipstick.
“I'll give you some of mine. You’re lucky you look as well as you do without it. I look like a sheet of blank paper without makeup.”
“You do not,” Sarah called after her, as her mother crossed the stateroom to her own rooms, to get her daughter some lipstick. She returned a moment later and held it out to her, as Sarah obediently splashed her face with cold water and combed her hair. In her sweater and slacks, with her hair loose past her shoulders, she looked like a young girl again, and her mother smiled as they left the cabin, arm in arm, to find Sarah’s father.
They found him on the promenade deck, comfortably soaking up the sun in a deck chair, while two attractive young men played shuffleboard near him. He had intentionally taken up the deck chair closest to them, the
“I know, darling … I know … I can only imagine what it was like. I know it must have been awful. But it’s over And you’re not Your life is just beginning. Don’t give up before you’ve given it a chance. Look around, feel the breeze, smell the flowers, let yourself live again Please …”
Sarah clung to her as she listened to her mother’s words, and finally told her how she felt, as she continued to cry. “I can’t anymore… I’m too afraid….”
“I’m right here with you.” But they hadn’t been able to help her before—until the end, when they’d gotten her out of it But they couldn’t have made Freddie behave, or come home at night, or give up his girlfriends and his prostitutes, and they hadn’t been able to save the baby. She had learned the hard way that there were times when no one else could help you, not even your parents.
“You have to try again, sweetheart. Just in tiny little steps. Father and I will be right here with you” She pulled away from her then, and looked into her daughter’s eyes. “We love you very, very much, Sarah, and we don’t want you hurt again either.”
Sarah closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “I’ll try.” She opened her eyes again then and looked at her mother. “I really will.” And then she panicked. “But what if I can’t do it?”
“Can’t do what?” Her mother smiled at her. “Can’t take a walk with me and Father? Can’t have dinner with us? Can’t meet a few of our friends? I think you can. We won’t ask for too much, and if it really is more than you can do, then you’ll tell us.” It was as though she had become an invalid, and in some ways, she had. Freddie had crippled her, and she knew it The question now was if she could be healed, or helped; if she would recover. Her mother couldn’t bear the thought that maybe she couldn’t. “How about a walk?”
“I look awful. My eyes must be swollen. And my nose always gets red when I cry.” She laughed through her tears as her mother made a face at her.
“That’s the worst piece of nonsense I’ve ever heard. Your nose is not red.” Sarah hopped out of her chair to look in the mirror and gave a shout of disgust.
“It is too! Look at it, it looks like a red potato!”
“Let me see….” Victoria narrowed her eyes and peered at Sarah’s nose as she shook her head. “It must be a very, very small potato. I don’t think anyone will notice anything, if you throw a little cold water on your face, and comb your hair, and maybe even put on a spot of lipstick.” She hadn’t worn makeup in months, and she didn’t seem to care, and up until now, Victoria hadn’t pressed it.
“I didn’t bring any with me.” Sarah looked deliberately vague. She really didn’t know if she wanted to try, but she was touched by what her mother had said, and she didn’t want to be completely uncooperative, even if that meant wearing lipstick.
“I'll give you some of mine. You’re lucky you look as well as you do without it. I look like a sheet of blank paper without makeup.”
“You do not,” Sarah called after her, as her mother crossed the stateroom to her own rooms, to get her daughter some lipstick. She returned a moment later and held it out to her, as Sarah obediently splashed her face with cold water and combed her hair. In her sweater and slacks, with her hair loose past her shoulders, she looked like a young girl again, and her mother smiled as they left the cabin, arm in arm, to find Sarah’s father.
They found him on the promenade deck, comfortably soaking up the sun in a deck chair, while two attractive young men played shuffleboard near him. He had intentionally taken up the deck chair closest to them, the
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