Read Online Harvest of Dreams (The Gods' Dream Trilogy) by Debra Holland - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Debra Holland
Tags: Romance, Love Story
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began to take advantage of his appearance, wealth, and position to lord over everyone his own age and younger, and many older people too—at least, those not close to his father.
Now, in seeing himself through Guinheld’s eyes, shame began to grow in his belly. Thaddis wanted to turn away from his younger self, from the harm he did to others by his arrogant indifference, the slights and hurts he caused each day through selfishness and entitlement, the hearts he’d broken. The more he made others hurt, no matter how unintentional, the more their pain lodged in his chest. Or was it his own regrets that grew so heavy and hard to bear?
It was your defects of character, Thaddis, which made you ripe to become Ontarem’s pawn, the Goddess told him in a dispassionate mental voice before plunging him back into his past.
His bond of brotherhood with Indaran, Crown Prince of Seagem, played out—mostly scenes of companionship and camaraderie, but sometimes, he’d carried rivalry and competition too far.
Both young princes vied for the attention of the same woman. Thaddis had won her affections and experienced a rush from defeating his opponent. But when the competition lagged, he’d cast the girl aside, never giving her another thought. He didn’t even remember her name.
Now though, he watched her teetering on the edge of the cliff, pregnant with his child, a haunted look on her gaunt face, and knew she planned to jump. He called out to stop her, but she leaped anyway. His yell followed her flight all the way down until she landed in the ocean and sank, never to reappear.
Shocked, shaking, Thaddis relived that scene several times until he stopped screaming when she jumped and instead fell to his knees on the edge of the cliff and begged her forgiveness.
After that, when the scene replayed, he didn’t discard her. Instead, when he found she was pregnant, Thaddis asked her to marry him, even though he didn’t love her. Yet when they married, and their son was born, he found his feelings turning into warm affection, and realized they could, indeed, enjoy a comfortable, loving marriage.
Relieved, Thaddis thought he’d passed that test, but instead, the Goddess flung him back into the scene several times. He began to get angry with Guinheld, growling a few choice curses at Her, to which She seemed impervious.
Then the truth smacked him. This time, he refrained from engaging in the competition with Indaran. He let Seagem’s prince flirt with the girl. Nothing ended up happening between the two. Margary . Thaddis remembered her name now. A few years later, Margary happily married a baker and went on to bear seven children.
Like a piece of flotsam drifting on the sea and tossed onto the beach by a wave, Thaddis emerged from Guinheld’s trance. He lay there on the cushion, gasping, sweat coating his body. Every muscle ached as if he’d been in sword bouts all day.
Devore came to his side.
“How long?” Thaddis croaked.
“An hour and a half.”
“So little time.” He tried to stretch his mouth into a wry smile. “It felt like forty years.”
Devore leaned over him, studying his face.
Thaddis could barely move his head to track him.
The Archpriest handed Thaddis a glass and helped him sit.
Gratefully, Thaddis gulped the honey-flavored water, drained the contents, and handed the glass back to Devore.
The Archpriest eased him back down.
“Can I ask you something?” Thaddis had a hard time getting the words out through the constriction in his throat.
Devore nodded.
“Margary…. She was really pregnant with my son? Jumped off the cliff?”
Devore nodded again.
“And the baker she married?”
“What her future would have been if you’d been honorable and left her alone.”
Thaddis closed his eyes. His son would have been…he counted back the years… nineteen now. Grief washed over him…for the child…for the mother…for what could have been. Tears leaked into his eyes and rolled down his
Now, in seeing himself through Guinheld’s eyes, shame began to grow in his belly. Thaddis wanted to turn away from his younger self, from the harm he did to others by his arrogant indifference, the slights and hurts he caused each day through selfishness and entitlement, the hearts he’d broken. The more he made others hurt, no matter how unintentional, the more their pain lodged in his chest. Or was it his own regrets that grew so heavy and hard to bear?
It was your defects of character, Thaddis, which made you ripe to become Ontarem’s pawn, the Goddess told him in a dispassionate mental voice before plunging him back into his past.
His bond of brotherhood with Indaran, Crown Prince of Seagem, played out—mostly scenes of companionship and camaraderie, but sometimes, he’d carried rivalry and competition too far.
Both young princes vied for the attention of the same woman. Thaddis had won her affections and experienced a rush from defeating his opponent. But when the competition lagged, he’d cast the girl aside, never giving her another thought. He didn’t even remember her name.
Now though, he watched her teetering on the edge of the cliff, pregnant with his child, a haunted look on her gaunt face, and knew she planned to jump. He called out to stop her, but she leaped anyway. His yell followed her flight all the way down until she landed in the ocean and sank, never to reappear.
Shocked, shaking, Thaddis relived that scene several times until he stopped screaming when she jumped and instead fell to his knees on the edge of the cliff and begged her forgiveness.
After that, when the scene replayed, he didn’t discard her. Instead, when he found she was pregnant, Thaddis asked her to marry him, even though he didn’t love her. Yet when they married, and their son was born, he found his feelings turning into warm affection, and realized they could, indeed, enjoy a comfortable, loving marriage.
Relieved, Thaddis thought he’d passed that test, but instead, the Goddess flung him back into the scene several times. He began to get angry with Guinheld, growling a few choice curses at Her, to which She seemed impervious.
Then the truth smacked him. This time, he refrained from engaging in the competition with Indaran. He let Seagem’s prince flirt with the girl. Nothing ended up happening between the two. Margary . Thaddis remembered her name now. A few years later, Margary happily married a baker and went on to bear seven children.
Like a piece of flotsam drifting on the sea and tossed onto the beach by a wave, Thaddis emerged from Guinheld’s trance. He lay there on the cushion, gasping, sweat coating his body. Every muscle ached as if he’d been in sword bouts all day.
Devore came to his side.
“How long?” Thaddis croaked.
“An hour and a half.”
“So little time.” He tried to stretch his mouth into a wry smile. “It felt like forty years.”
Devore leaned over him, studying his face.
Thaddis could barely move his head to track him.
The Archpriest handed Thaddis a glass and helped him sit.
Gratefully, Thaddis gulped the honey-flavored water, drained the contents, and handed the glass back to Devore.
The Archpriest eased him back down.
“Can I ask you something?” Thaddis had a hard time getting the words out through the constriction in his throat.
Devore nodded.
“Margary…. She was really pregnant with my son? Jumped off the cliff?”
Devore nodded again.
“And the baker she married?”
“What her future would have been if you’d been honorable and left her alone.”
Thaddis closed his eyes. His son would have been…he counted back the years… nineteen now. Grief washed over him…for the child…for the mother…for what could have been. Tears leaked into his eyes and rolled down his
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